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There When I Need You

November 8, 2012
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Last night I had what I can only describe as a meltdown.  I’m not proud to say that this isn’t the first one I’ve had since my son was born.  But I don’t remember ever having one quite this bad that was not influenced by fertility drugs.  It was like every clomid rage and case of the progesterone suppository blues combined and multiplied by ten.  Ick.

It’s still a bit too raw and embarrassing and self-effacing for me to go into what led to this meltdown, so I won’t go there at the moment.  The point of this post is what happened afterwards.  It was 7:00.  My husband was still at work (as he generally is until about 8 pm most nights these days).  My son was in his crib, on the verge of falling asleep.  I was sobbing rather hysterically.  I sent my husband a text that just said “I need you to come home.”

I felt guilty doing it.  I felt like I was being a drama queen and that I needed to just push through and get over it.  I figured he’d say, “I need to wrap up a few things but I’ll be there as soon as I can” or something else along those lines.  But you know what he said?  Within about five seconds?  “Okay, I’ll leave now.”

I actually was in shock for a moment.  Really?  My little text for help had that power?  Yes, yes it did.  I’m sure if I did this sort of thing every day it wouldn’t get him to drop everything.  But he knew I needed him, and he didn’t care about the consequences at work if he just told them he had to go.  And that’s exactly what he did.  He got home in record time.  We talked on the phone while he drove home so he could make sure I was okay.  And as soon as he came home he gave me a big hug and made everything feel better at that moment.

We recently celebrated our five year wedding anniversary.  And these are the moments that remind me of how lucky I am.  There may have been a time when I had a laundry list of “requirements” for my future husband, but nowadays, this is the very top of the list.  I need a husband who is there for me when I need him.  And I am happy to report that my husband definitely is.  I am one lucky lady.

This morning, things look a bit brighter.  The meltdown is behind me.  My husband is back at work.  Before long, I will be too.  But it’s good to know we have each other’s backs.

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